Potty Training Bam Bam: Phase 1-Sensitizing:Disposable Diaper Withdraw

I would like to thank the disposable Diaper industry for making Bam Bam depend on diapers.  Bam Bam is wondering why he should start using the potty now.  I know what Bam Bam is thinking, “Why in the world would I want to stop what I’m doing to use the potty when I can potty in my diaper and not have to stop? That doesn’t make sense mama!”  I can see his point but it’s time for Bam Bam to start using the potty.

Bam Bam not liking the potty

Thanks to the desensitizing effect the Disposable Diaper has for extracting pee away from my sons skin for the past nineteen months, I have to now sensitize Bam Bam to feel how nasty it is to be wet.  Poop doesn’t seem to matter with or without disposable diapers.  It seem like poop doesn’t bother him much….go figure.

I started on Tuesday to potty train Bam Bam.  My mission is to sensitize him into feeling the wetness at this early stage of potty training.  The tools that I will need for this mission are as follows:
  • Potty
  • Cloth Potty training pants
  • Paper towels (For clean up)
  • Clorox cleaning wipes (For disinfecting purposes)
  • Extra sets of clothes for accidents
  • Patience (Ok, patience isn’t a tool but if it was I would get plenty of it)
The plan is to sensitize Bam Bam to the point that he is VERY uncomfortable wearing pee pee and poop in his cloth potty training pants and would want them off him.  Also, putting him in cloth training pants helps Bam Bam to be aware of the function of his penis and know that pee pee comes from there. Finally, this will help him in the long run to learn to hold his pee and poop long enough until he gets to a potty.
Since starting potty training two days ago, Bam Bam is doing pretty well with the sensitizing or what I like to call it, “Diaper Withdraw”.  He will let me know when he wets himself by calling “MAMA!” or he will pull on my arm if I’m sitting down or if I’m standing, he would grab the bottom of my shirt and pull me where he wants me to go to notice that his training pants are wet.  Bam Bam did these things before the training pants so I knew that these were the signs that he went pee pee.  But with the cloth diapers, if they get too wet, Bam Bam would start crying loudly and whimper to let me know that it’s an emergency to take his training pants off.  That is the result that I was looking for….the feeling of uncomfortable wetness.
When Bam Bam tells or cries that he is wet, I tell him “You have to say, “Potty” so I know that you have to go potty.”  Then I take him to the potty and have him sit or stand up to pee to see if he has anymore. Every time he is wet, I take him to the potty.  I try not to schedule the times he goes to the potty as of yet.  My focus is to get Bam Bam to realize that it’s not appropriate to pee or poop on himself.  If he has to go to the bathroom, he needs to go to the potty.  Bam Bam is only in training pants during the times that he is awake. I still put diapers on him when he naps, bedtime, and if we’re out and about.  I will gradually change from diapers to training pants or underwear once he’s able to hold his pee long enough.  
I think one of the mistakes that parents make when potty training is to put them on the potty straight away and sitting with them to see if they will go to the potty.  Learning this from The Don, the child will wait until the diaper is on them and then go because for the first year or two of their lives, they peed and pooped in their diaper.  It’s important to sensitize the desensitize child into feeling the wetness and they will understand that peeing and pooping on themselves doesn’t feel good.

I will continue to sensitize him over the next couple of weeks to see if he understands to go to the potty and see how long he can hold his pee and poop for at least an hour or so and then take potty training to the next phase.  


When I grow up and be a man…

The Don is going to be four years old in five days and already he wants to become a man.  All I been hearing lately is this sentence:  “When I grow up and be a man, I can….” fill in the blank.  It’s usually something along the lines of what he can not do e.g.  If The Don wants to drive my car and I tell him you have to be (in the state of Pennsylvania) sixteen years old to drive.  The response is, “When I grow up and be a man, I can drive a car.”
What The Don doesn’t realize is that what he doesn’t want to do is what helps him to grow up and be a great man.  For example, when I ask him to clean up his room he tells me, “When I grow up and be a man, I don’t have to clean my room.”  

I tell him, “Daddy is a grown man and he still clean up his room and rooms in the house. Cleaning your room is teaching you how to be neat and clean.  It also teaches you to work and be responsible for putting your things away.”
When it’s time to take a bath and I’m teaching The Don how to wash himself but he wants to play in the bath water instead, he says, “When I grow up and be a man, I can play in the bath water all I want.”  

I would say to him, “As a man, you will need to learn how to clean yourself because no one should be touching or cleaning your body but you.  It’s your responsibility to keep yourself clean.”
When its dinner time and he doesn’t want to eat the purple cabbage, he would say, “When I grow up and be a man, I don’t have to eat the purple” (he doesn’t say cabbage).  

My husband would say, “When you become a man, you have to know what things are healthy for you to eat and what’s not.  Cabbage is good for you and will make you a stronger man.”
The one thing that The Don doesn’t like to do is to listen and do what he is told.  I guess no one really likes to be told what to do but it’s something we can’t avoid especially at work.  So, when I tell The Don to do something and he doesn’t do it, I will tell him that he has to learn to listen.   He says, “When I grow up and be a man, I don’t have to listen.”  

I tell him, “When you become a man, there are more rules you have to follow and listen to whether it’s for your safety or work.  You will be told what to do.  It is important to listen and follow directions so you wouldn’t get hurt.  As a man, it’s important to understand and listen to what people have to say especially when it comes to safety and not to break any rules because your life can depend on it.”

The Don being a kid with his little brother Bam Bam

Whether The Don realizes it or not, what we are doing and showing him is what will make him a better man when he gets older.  Cleaning his rooms teaches neatness and organization.  Washing himself teaches him to care about his body enough to keep it clean.  Eating health food teaches him what foods will make him big and strong and teaches him to choice healthy food choices.  Learning to listen will help him be a better communicator and understanding of people.  How to listen also helps him understand what he can and can not do in this society and to have respect for authority.  All we are doing is teach him how to be a responsible man when he grows up.  I guess he won’t see that until be becomes a man.  

I know The Don feels that being a man must be better than being a kid right now but one day when he is working hard and taking care of his family, he’ll look back on when he didn’t have any real responsibilities and have all the time in the world to play as a kid and realize that he didn’t have it so bad after all.  I know some days I do.  When he becomes a man, I know he will be a great one.  I just wish he would enjoy being a kid before it is too late to appreciate it.