I have two different personalities with the kids. I swear I do. It’s like there’s two different mamas living in my house. I’m the nice, calm, and patient mama to Bambino and then I become the impatient, hard-ass, drillsergeant with The Don and I think it’s freaking The Don out. I shouldn’t say freaking him out, confusing him maybe. You see, for those of you who never read my blog, I have a three year old and an eleven month old. Both are boys. Now my three year old is going through power struggles, attitudes, sneakiness, hard headedness, etc. In order words, The Don is becoming difficult. While Bambino is innocent, sweet, curious, lovable, warm. In order words, Bambino is just being a baby.
When The Don was a baby, I was nice to him as well as I am with Bambino. Anything that he did was cute, funny, or playful. Now when The Don, for example, blow raspberries, put things in his mouth, jump off the couch, or drop things and don’t pick them up, I turn into drill sergeant mama. The mama with the stern look and the suddenly deep, angry voice that would make you think that I have been possessed by demons. The Don must be thinking, “Where is the nice mommy I use to know two years ago and why is the nice mommy showing up with Bambino?” You can see why The Don is a little confused.
Let me give you a few examples of the boys doing the same antics and how I would reaction to them:
Putting objects/fingers in their mouths:
Bambino: (nice, calm, concern voice.) Don’t put your finger/object in your mouth now. You could choke and spit up your food. (Gently removes fingers/object from mouth).
The Don: (angry, flipping my shit, demon like voice)How many times I have to tell you not to put object/fingers in your mouth? You’re too old to be doing that. Stop it right now! (Aggressively takes his fingers/object out of his mouth).
Climbing the furniture:
Bambino: (nice, calm, concern voice): Be careful not to climb the sofa. You can fall and hurt yourself. (Little giggle afterwards)
The Don: (angry, flipping my shit, demon like voice): Didn’t I tell you not to climb on the damn table? Get down RIGHT NOW! (Grabbing and/or lifting him angrily off the table)
Bambino: (nice, calm, concern voice): Oh you dropped your toy. Here, let mama get that for you. (Gently picks up the toy/cup and place it nicely on the table)
The Don: (angry, flipping my shit, demon like voice): Hey! You know you dropped that toy/cup on the floor. Pick it up right now and put it where it belongs! (Gives stern look making sure that he puts the object/cup to where it needs to be).
Bambino: (nice, calm, playful voice): Aw, you’re blowing raspberries. Aw, you’re so cute. (Blowing raspberries back at him.)
The Don: (angry, flipping my shit, demon like voice): Stop that! That’s disgusting! You’re spreading your germs everywhere. Don’t do that again! (Gives him a stern, I mean it look)
So you can see why The Don is a little confused. It’s no way that I can act in the same manner with both of them without The Don feeling confused or getting frustrated because I’m “nicer” to Bambino. I tell The Don know that since he’s older, he should know better. Bambino is a baby and is learning the rules. When Bambino is The Don’s age, he will be talked to the same way I talk to The Don. The Don just sees the injustice that he gets when he does the same “cute” things that Bambino is doing and being scorned for it.
Hopefully in time, The Don will understand that I not trying to be mean, that I’m trying to teach him what acceptable behavior is for his age. Until he learns what acceptable behavior is; I will keep drilling it into him until I don’t have to anymore. The Don will thank me for it or will go to a psychiatrist staying that he hates his mama because I was too “hard” on him. Either way, I bet you he won’t be dropping things, blowing raspberries, climbing and jumping off tables or putting things in his mouth like he has no sense. Society can thank me later…and you’re welcome.