In part I, it was planned that The Don and Bambino to stay at my parents house for a couple of days so my husband and I could spent some time together. That didn’t happen. Things got heated between my father and I about the situation so here’s the conclusion of Stay Over Bait and Switch:
“Ok, we are leaving. Pack up and let’s go!”
“I said let’s go!”
“Ok!” I grabbed their suitcase, Bambino play pen and started talking my kids shit out of there house to reloaded the car. My mother said, “Nessa, don’t worry about it, I’ll take care of Bambino. I’ll take care of Bambino”
“No, I’m not leaving him here where there’s tension around.”
“There’s no tension!” my father said.
“Yes there will be tension.” Knowing my father, any little whimper that comes out of Bambino, he would put in my mother’s ear that she need to call me to come and get him in the morning because Bambino ‘wants his mother’. And my mother would break down and call just to shut my father up. I didn’t want the stress and worry about my dad talking shit about Bambino and is he talking about him around The Don. That’s not good for The Don to see his grandfather talking shit about his little brother. I know my mother was upset but I told my mother, “I hope daddy’s pride was worth it because he cost you from having your grandchildren over this weekend.”
I didn’t think my parents through I was seriously leaving. When I came back into the house to get the kids toys and bottles of breast milk, I told them, “You know it would have been nice if you told me how you felt before I packed their things and came all the way down here.”
My father said, “It was you’re mother. She wanted to take Bambino. I wanted The Don to stay over.”
“Don’t blame mom. Don’t even blame her. You could have told me that you didn’t want to take care of Bambino.”
After my parents realized that I was seriously leaving, my father help take the last of the kids toys to the car. I was pissed but I hugged my mother and my father was like, “I’m still going to hug you because you’re my daughter.”
I said, “You’re my father but you either take both of the kids or none at all.” I loaded the kids in the car. My parents said goodbye to the kids. My father said to The Don when he said goodbye to him, “Sorry buddy but I believe what I believe,” trying to act like he was the ‘good guy’ to The Don.
I said, “Yeah, he believes a psychologist then his own daughter.” I left with the quickness.
There were certain things that bother me about this situation. For one, I sensed that my father favored The Don more than Bambino which I do not and will not condone even though I can’t change if he does favor The Don. Another thing is that my father didn’t feel like helping to take care of an infant. It seemed like Bambino’s crying and fuzziness irritated my father and he didn’t want to deal with it. Also, if it was a problem taking care of Bambino, my father himself should have told me before I came by instead having my mother and I think it was alright to bring Bambino too. It’s not like my father didn’t have my phone number. Finally, my father tried to use some psychological bullshit to try to persuade me to take Bambino and to leave The Don with them when I got there. Why would he think that I would leave The Don and just take Bambino back away? This whole situation pissed me the fuck off.
My parents better not ask me for another stay over after what my dad tried to pull. Thanks to my father, they blown any chances that they could have in letting the kids sleep over. Although I felt this before with The Don when he stayed over with my parents, I definitely don’t trust my father now around the kids especially the way he talked to Bambino. It makes me think that he probably did the same with The Don those few times he stayed over. I will not allow my father to talk to my kids anyway he feels like it. And if I’m not there, who will stop him from talking or psychologically bullying them? Not my mother. She’s won’t stand up to him. She didn’t do that with me or my sister when we were kids either. If they’re going to babysit my kids so my husband and I can have some free time, babysit the kids. It’s not, ‘I will babysit the kids only if they don’t act up, cry, scream or make a scene. They must be happy when they’re around me all the time. Otherwise, I’ll give you some bullshit excuse to weasel my way out of babysitting your kids.’
Now I know that if my parents want to see the kids, it WILL be supervised. No spending the night unless it’s a real emergency and my mother in law can’t tend to them. I can’t trust my parents. I especially can’t trust my father. I will do what it takes to protect my children family member or not. My parents are about to lose there privileges in seeing their grandchildren if this behavior continues. I’m not afraid to walk away as they seen and I hope my parents finally realized that. Otherwise, they will not only lose seeing their grandchildren, they will lose me as well.